I Can’t Keep Up, and I Know It

Remember how two short posts ago, I promised a stream of new posts? You know, to catch up on everything that’s been happening the last month… errr… two months now?

I know, it’s not happening. I can’t keep up, and I know it.

I have a long list of posts I want to write. I have a planner, where I write my goals for the week. I go so far as to pencil in time for personal posts. As I cross off chores, work goals, appointments, playdates, and time with friends, the ‘blog post’ line often goes untouched.  

I sometimes feel paralyzed by that list of posts. How can I possibly write about the magic of Disneyland and the sheer joy (and sometimes terror) on Jackson’s face in a quick post? I can’t. It deserves passion and time. And so, I will write when the mood strikes me, about the things I feel about writing about. And somewhere in those posts, we’ll get caught up.

My days are a never-ending balance of work, time spent with Jackson, cleaning, getting to the gym, finding time with friends, FaceTime-ing, putting laundry away, keeping up with the yard work (or not), playing with the dog, preparing meals, tackling the bed/bath time routine, more work, drinking wine (kidding not kidding), collapsing into bed, repeat. With Tyler gone, there are few moments I find for myself. (I’ve even been known to schedule my showers in that trusty planner.)

We are sprinting, sprinting to that finish line. (My heart literally JUMPS at the thought of Tyler’s presence.)  

In the meantime, please forgive me for my lack of posts. While writing is my outlet, there isn’t always time.

Now – it’s 9:24pm, and I should be working.

Someday, I’ll get caught up. I promise. Maybe.

Midnight Snacks

 

Last night Jackson woke up crying at 3:30am. I can count on two fingers the number of times he has woken up in the middle of the night in the last year – it almost never happens (I know , I know- don't stab me). I quickly jumped out of bed and into his room, where I found him sitting in his crib.

“Mom?” he said with a froggy voice.

“Yeah, baby?” I responded.

“I need a snack, first.” He said.

So down we went to the dark kitchen, dimly lit only by a light on the fridge. For ten sweet minutes, he munched on a banana and drank milk, while we had a conversation. We talked about missing Colorado, about running on the treadmill, and other random thoughts that occurred to him in the wee hours of the morning.

And I savored. I savored the peaceful night, the moonlight defining his sweet face, and the fleeting baby he won’t be for much longer.

As I laid him back in his crib, I marveled at how lucky we are. At how amazing he is. And at the fact that I have never, in my life, enjoyed a middle-of-the-night wakeup call quite this much.

"Goodnight, baby."

"Night, Mama."

As I laid back down in my own bed, my breath caught for a moment, as I became painfully aware that he won’t be this little forever. He won’t need me to feed him midnight snacks forever. These moments, they fly by. And my heart ached for the little boy he won’t always be.

Everything’s a little harder to swallow when you’re alone in the tiny hours of the morning, though, right?

Colorado Roundup

Whenever we spend time in Colorado, I come home with 1,000,000 pictures and just as many great memories. The only way I know to document my trips is to shove all my favorite pictures into one blog post. This, of course, does the trip no justice.

I'm going to go ahead and do it anyway.

This time, Jackson and I were fortunate enough to make a three-week trip out of the deal, with two weeks spent in Colorado, and the week in the middle in California. In those two weeks, we squeezed in family, friends, pool time, park time, and some really delicious food.

I've learned that no matter how long our visits are, they are never long enough. There are always people I wanted to spend more time with, and things I wanted to do (that silly incline is STILL on my to-do list).

Thank you to everyone who kept their schedules so flexible and bended over backward to see us. We heart Colorado.

If you're still reading, here goes....

 

Remember how Jackson used to be a terrible traveler? I do. But now, he's like, the coolest. He sleeps, plays games, and drinks his mid-flight drink like a chap. Hallelujah.

 

 

 

A couple of my besties live in Colorado - Jamie and Melissa. And Kelly happened to be in town at the same time - making a fun-filled day in Denver possible. We took full advantage of endless Mimosas at brunch, dropped by a Rockies game, and I made it back to Melissa's to meet Frank, possibly the coolest golden retriever, ever.

 

It takes a village. Auntie haircuts for the win.

 

 

Fancy dinners.

 

And barbeques with family.

 

A playdate with my long-time friend Lisa, and her cutie, Hudson.

Games with great grandpa.

 



 

And adventures by the pool.

 

That's Mara.

 

My grandpa and grandma Jan.

 

Learning so much about my grandma via her scrapbooks.

 

Playing in fountains.

 

And blowing bubbles.

 

Girls nights in.

 



Church.

 



 

And bedtime stories and kisses.

 

...and laughs.

 

 

More stories.

 

And big hugs.

 

Baking for daddy with Aunt Shea.

 

Days at the park.

  

And striking a pose.

 

 

Until next time, Colorado.

A Visit that Filled Our Hearts

It's been over a month since my last post - and boy, have we been busy. Stay tuned for several updates as I get caught up on the incredible month that was July.

July kicked off with a bang, as Tyler took advantage of a four day weekend and made a quick trip home. While the three days he was here absolutely FLEW by, we couldn't have had a better, more well-spent few days together.

Day 1 - Homemade breakfast, book-reading, playing, and date night.

 

She peed herself, literally.

 

Baaaacon!!!

 

Better than Florida, right?!

 

Deliciously bad food truck food.

 

Day 2 - Family vet visit (because I refuse to do it alone), lawn work, and an epic barbeque.

 



 

The great firefly search.

 

Day 3 - The fourth of July. Tyler had to leave in the afternoon, but we first enjoyed a lazy morning and some target practice. Nothing says 'Merica quite like shooting a gun in your backyard.

 

Champagne, because... champagne.

 



 



We are blessed to have the opportunity to see each other during this six months. Most don't. Incredibly grateful for a refreshing few days.